10 Questions You Should Not Ask Your Egg Donor
BackEgg donation or oocyte donation or ovum donation is used as an effective treatment for infertility for women suffering from infertility occurred due to anatomic issues with the uterus, like severe intrauterine adhesions. There are higher rates of success achieved with egg donation as compared to the rate of pregnancy in women with poor egg quantity and quality.
We always emphasize on the fact that intended parents should talk only what is utmost important with the egg donors. The conversation should be limited to important topics related to the egg donation and not unnecessary things that might hamper the serenity of the conversation.
Egg donor agencies play an important role in monitoring the conversation and not let it get carried away for any reason. There are occasions when intended parents get carried away and they ask questions related to deep privacy of the egg donor. This might offend the egg donor and she might withdraw her consent of donating her eggs. In order to have a smooth conversation and exchange of details between the intended parents and egg donor, the intended parents must be guided with certain ethics related to egg donation. This will help them understand the importance of the service rendered by the egg donor. Intended parents will be in a better position to understand the benefits that they are getting and be grateful for it.
Egg donation is one of the greatest services offered by donors. It is one important and precious gift that someone can offer to an infertile couple. Providing donor eggs enables a childless couple to have a child which would not have been possible otherwise. Lower AMH count and diminished ovarian reserve are the major factors that promote the chances of using an egg donor for the successful completion of the IVF cycle. These concerns are brilliantly covered by using egg donors. This does not let any uncalled delay in the total procedure and also saves much of a cost.
There are certain questions that you should avoid asking an Egg Donor. As an intended parent, you should understand the social stigma of being an egg Donor and respect the services that she is offering you. Avoid the following questions while having a conversation with the egg Donor on the sensitive topic of egg donation:
1. How much money are you taking from the agency for this session of egg donation?
Do not ask them about the monetary benefit that they are taking against the egg they are donating. Every egg Donor has a different reason for egg donation. As a matter of fact, we all know that egg donors are paid for their services. This does not mean that they have chosen egg donation for only financial reason. Many egg donors are motivated to contribute to fertility treatment of childless couples and help them build their family. If you know the real physical and mental stress that an egg Donor takes during the procedure of egg donation you will understand that the amount they are taking against it is very negligible.
2. Why have you chosen to be an egg donor?
Egg donation is not a conventional way for anyone. Do not make your egg donor feel abnormal as they have chosen to undergo this medical procedure. Where countless egg donors and each one of them is has a valid reason for donating their eggs. Instead of asking them unreasonable question be empathetic to them and ask them about their journey of being an Egg Donor. This will not only motivate them but also establish you as a supporting intended parent.
3. Are you aware that egg donation causes cancer?
There is a myth that egg donation causes Cancer to the egg Donor in the future. Many intended parents are noticed to ask this to the egg Donor. This is a very unreasonable question to ask someone who is going through a lot of physical and emotional changes in her to donate eggs to you. It is true that there is a potential long term effect of egg donation. However, there is no confidence this will cause cancer in the future. The egg Donor has already weighed the risks involved with the procedure and bringing up the possibility of growing cancer in the future is extremely scary to them. You have to be sensitive before talking about cancer with the egg Donor.
4. Don’t you think people should go for adoption and not assisted reproduction for the sake of world-population?
There are open silly questions ask about overpopulation caused by egg donation. The intended parents sometimes make the egg Donor uncomfortable by passing such remarks. Intended have to well understand that adoption is not always the best option for everyone and hence they have chosen assisted reproductive technologies to start their family.
5. Are you married?
It is not a necessary thing to ask an egg donor whether she is married or not. Do not try and enter deep into her private space and compel her to talk about something that she doesn’t want to talk about.
6. How your husband does react to your decision of being an egg donor?
These are sensitive things between the egg donor and her husband. Asking such insensitive and the weird question will only make her embarrassed and uncomfortable.
7. Do your kids know that they have brothers and sisters out their home?
Egg donors have their own ways of presenting their work in front of their family. Their kids are adjusted with the fact and they know about their mother’s work as and when they grow up. So asking such a question is completely irrelevant.
8. How will you react if someday the kids born out of your eggs show up to you?
Sometimes intended parents be over practical and ask insensitive questions out of curiosity to the egg Donor that might shame them. They might ask about what will happen when all the kids, born out of their eggs, will show up to them at some point in time. Such questions are frivolous and must be avoided.
9. How do your parents react to your decision about being an egg donor?
Some intended parents are also noted to ask questions about how the egg donors parents react to their decision of donating eggs. These are very sensitive things and the private areas of the egg donors which should not be asked under any situation.
10. Will you try to get in touch with our kid in the future?
Intended parents remain anxious about the fact that an egg donor might turn up to their kid in the future and tell the kid about her. Or they might try to manipulate the kid. Hence, they sometimes ask the egg donor about it. However, this is also an unnecessary question to be asked to the egg donor as the contract itself mentions that egg donors will not contact the kid in the future without the parent’s consent.